Andhra Pradesh has been in the NEWS lately for a lot of reasons. Firstly, the Telangana saga which involved the national pastime - bus burning - which both the pro as well the anti telangana parties took part in heartily. But while few were spreading hate, "the man" Narayan Dutt Tiwari was spreading love (and extraneous things) with 3 women.

Now, most men find it hard to get a single girl. At age 84 NDT is in bed with three. This is what makes him NDT - the man, the legend. Sadly, people didn't notice the plus points in this incident which I'll highlight since I'm currently ‘Optimistic Leo’!

1. Convincing powers: Convincing a girl to talk to you when you are 84 is a pretty big deal (even if she is related). Getting her to share a bed is a million levels above (even if she is a prostitute). Now getting three of them to do it at the same time is the mark of a genius convincer. What takes this a gazillion levels over awesomeness is that he gets the entire thing on tape.

2. A blessing to politics: For years politicians have tried to get the youth interested in politics. NDT did it overnight, without a speech and without his clothes.

3.Bravery: I'm personally a one woman man... one woman at a time that is. His outstanding (still standing) act deserves a red and white bravery award.

But the media only saw him as another run of the mill pervert. He resigned after two days on the grounds of ill-health. A clear lie! If he's in weak health then I clearly have both my feet (along with my jewels) in the grave. He could be exhausted but ill-health? Impossible!

He then proceeded to deny all charges which showcased his humble and human side. Any man would gloat about this act but ‘NDT - the man, the legend’ is as modest as he is sexually potent. He also stated that the tapes were a by product of a language bias. If this is what a language bias leads to in Andhra Pradesh, then I'm packing my bags! Screw the beaches of Goa! Yay to the bitches of Andhra!

old man narayan dutt tiwari three women youtube video

Sadly, now NDT is unemployed. I do not want to let a talented and legendary of his caliber without any source of income. So, I've devised plans and business ideas for him.

1. NDT [V] - We already have India's first porn comics, NTD [V] will be India's first porn channel. He may get into legal issues with NDTV but let’s not forget that this guy has excellent convincing power. The censor board will also bend over and let him do what ever he wants.

2. Book - Move aside Tucker Max. NDT will the new banger of females. NDT will pen down all his debaucheries and escapades into a book quite originally titled "I hope they serve beer in Gujarat". The book is all set to be banned in Gujarat while its sales sky-rocket elsewhere. The book will include "The famous no pants story" and "The dandiya night we almost died" among others.

3. Coaching classes: Coaching classes are a big hit in India (even more than actual colleges). NDT will start his own coaching class ‘NDT and Naughty’. A first of its kind, ‘NDT and Naughty’ will teach the less charismatic the tricks of the trade for picking up women (notice the plural).

4. TV commercials: NDT can become the face for multiple brands.

Boost – The secret of my energy.
Rupa – Yeh andar ki baat hai.
‘Thums Up’ – Taste the thunder.
Sprite – Bhujaye only ‘pyaas’, baki all bakwaas.
His own brand of hair gel – Stays hard even after 84 years!
…. And many more!

I hope NDT loves my advice because I genuinely respect him like every other male in India should! I hope he continues on his escapades and I wish him well!
Amen.

PS: I pity the current Governor of Andhra Pradesh. He’ll have real trouble walking in NDT’s pants… I mean shoes.

PPS: For those who do not know Tucker Max. Here is his site www.TuckerMax.com. Read ‘The Famous Sushi Pants Story’.

Like political humour/ celeb scandals? Check these: