Problem: Mohammad Amir Ajmal Kasab (the lone surviving terrorist of 26/11) needs to be taken from his special cell in Arthur Road Jail to the special court (He’s one special person!) in a month’s time. The distance between the two is 20 feet. Those responsible feel that he could be attacked during this 20 foot journey. How do you ensure his safety?
Solution (selected by those responsible): A Rs. 2 Crore project is underway to construct a bomb/ bullet proof tunnel. The tunnel will be centrally air-conditioned and have surveillance cameras all over the place. This project is expected to be completed in a month.
The problem in the solution (according to Big Fish Mag):
Problem 1:We personally think that spending Rs. 2 Crore on a terrorist isn’t the brightest idea. We think that the Big Fish team deserves the Rs. 2 Crore more than Mr. Kasab because:
| Kasab | Big Fish Mag Team |
|---|---|
|
1. Number of murders committed: More than 10 |
1. Number of murders committed: 0 |
|
2. Number of days spent in Taj: Approximately 3 days |
2. Number of days spent in Taj: 0 |
|
3. Number of AK 47s/ grenades found in possession: Really high |
3. Number of AK 47s/ grenades found in possession: 0 |
|
4. Contribution to society: Nil |
4. Contribution to society: We have made over 2000 people laugh and have wasted 5 minutes of Mr. Sam’s life*. |
|
5. Number of times photo has been displayed on national TV/ News Papers: Innumerable |
5. Number of times photo has been displayed on national TV/ News Papers: 0 |
The only way we could get Rs. 2 Crore is by doing a Slumdog Crorepati twice!!
Problem 2: While members of Big Fish Mag and other responsible Indians are being rejected by women owing to sweat-induced body odour, Kasab will have an Air-Conditioned walk.
Problem 3: Let’s face it, Indians are lazy. We have never completed anything as per schedule. This project won’t be completed until the U.S. gets its first Indian-American president! One month is too short a time.
Solution (By Big Fish Mag): Take the judge and the lawyers to the special prison cell instead of taking Kasab to the special court. Saves money, saves time and no risk involved. Common sense can go a long way.
*This was Sam's comment when our site was just released.
Sam: Another stupid pseudo trying to act cool by making his own magazine. Come up with something original please. I just wasted five mintues browsing your stupid website and its gay articles.
Facebook
Twitter
Reddit
Stumble
Digg
Posts: 3
Reply #3 on : Sat October 31, 2009, 02:20:13