I shall now bestow upon Mohit the title of 'the most creative human alive'. I’m really not sure about the human part but the creative part is undisputed. Mohit commented on my article: I Won’t Let You Get Away With Stealing My Phone. Following which, I congratulated him and told him that he would feature in my next 'negative comments' post. The opportunity to be featured on BFM – India’s least read magazine – got him wet with excitement and he commented some more. Each of his posts reeks with talent along with other odors. The talent is his comments was hidden under multiple layers but I was able to spot it. So, here’s my tribute to the most creative human ever!
Comment 1:
Mohit: that shows u r really a gay
Here are a few rules about the English language.
Rule 1: You start a sentence with capitalization.
Rule 2: You end it with a period.
But for someone as creative as Mohit, rules are meant to be broken. What you actually see resembles English but is actually a completely new language invented by Mohit called WTFITS (What the fuck is this shit). In WTFITS, English words may have different meanings. For example, in my article, I showed deep concern over how a thief touched my balls and I don’t think he should have. Mohit referred to this act as gay. So, gay in WTFITS is actually not gay.
Comment 2:
Anonymous: u stupid leo here is an art-icle about you
u were not born naturally bcoz u r father was a gay, and he refused to be in bad with ur mom.so u r mom takes the another path, as u are in mid 40 and test tube facility was not there so u r mom got an idea he organized a three way, with ur dad boyfriend between ur parents so that help ur dad to bring him in the same bed with ur mom so some how u were born. but u were never aware of that after u turn 8, u found u and u r dad's boyfriend making love behind the tree and u get to know about u r source of homosexuality. so u started hating the trees and as u r papa was a gay bottom therfore he calls his boyfriend tiger during the sex to persude him and to fuck hard. so u started hating tigers too and after several years u managed to get a boyfriend who thinks priyanka chopra is sexier than u so u started hating her too.
to be continued........
What is this? Is this a sex story? Is this a passage from a detective novel? It’s both! It’s the greatest sex story with a dash of logic, reasoning, conclusions and bullshit. This story has homosexuality, heterosexuality, threesomes, borders on incest, hints at pedophilia, has tree fucking and includes a reference to bestiality. Honestly, I think this story could become a rage on www.IndianSexStories.com. The best part is the ‘to be continued’. The suspense is killing me!
As the second comment was posted anonymously, I looked at it and thought, “This looks like it’s written in WTFITS but it’s posted anonymously. Oh my! Who could this be? Damn! I guess, I’ll never solve this mystery”.
But Mohit solved my mystery with comment 3:
Mohit: u guess it write it is written by me.
Damn! This revelation left my testicles shivering for a minute or two. Mohit the above post was by you? I would have never guessed it. But you did do the write thing by writely taking credit for what you’ve posted.
Comment 4:
Mohit: i wont mind u delete it to safe ur ass.i pity on you bcoz u are the lucky bastard with so many fucking things happening in ur life, and ppl including me wasting there time reading ur articles.
articles which were just mere product of negativity u were born with.
Being a homosexual – a fact I couldn’t hide from someone who’s as creative and observant as you – the ass is a very important part. Hence, I’m really happy over the concern you’ve showed for my ass.
Comment 5:
Mohit: and i hope ur next post featuring me will be u r last post. if u have anything to say..
Ah! Mohit, I know you want to remain in the spotlight. I’m really sorry but despite your awesomeness, I can’t stop writing. I know I won’t be able to be as creative as your but, I guess, I’ll at least die trying.
PS: Some more information on WTFITS
Bad: (noun) bed.
Sentence: u r such a bad girl
This sentence means the girl in reference is a bed girl i.e. someone who’s always lying on the bed which literally means lazy.
For more lessons on WTFITS, you can contact Mohit at *e-mail id removed* since he was kind enough to leave his e-mail id.
Update: 99% of the times when you rip on someone for being grammatically incorrect or spelling improperly, you end up making a mistake as well. I read this post around 10 times to make sure I didn't let a typo slip through. But then as Rohan pointed out in the comments section I had made a mistake in the title. #facepalm.
Update: Apparently, the comment
Vinod Naidu: @mohit
Hahahaha. You pwned him
Was by Mohit. This guy is a genius!
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Posts: 66
Reply #73 on : Sat April 17, 2010, 04:22:26