Around the beginning of this year, women across the globe decided to slap intelligence in the face by posting their bra colors under the guise of raising breast cancer awareness. Maybe, because bra colors and breast cancer awareness go hand in hand. While it did raise a few erections which went hand in hand and women got a chance to be 'naughty' and 'cute', breast cancer took a back seat. Last week saw another viral which I call the Facebook 'I like it here' Fiasco. While I was busy understanding how computer processes can work on shared data using different methods for mutual exclusion, women decided to post something on the lines of 'I like it on the bed/ table/ closet/ under a goat's testicles'. Boners were instantly sprouted and the day was almost about to be named 'World Boner Day' but then it turned out that this was round two of females showcasing their stupidity. It was a meme for women to let everyone know where they like to keep their handbags using sexual innuendos. The 'it' in 'I like it in the car' was for handbags.
Since the last one was for creating breast cancer awareness maybe this one was to create handbag awareness? Maybe men do not know much about handbags and their importance. Guess what? NO ONE GIVES A FUCK ABOUT YOUR HANGBAG! No one cares if you have a handbag, what you put in it, or where you keep it. Unless you are pulling out rabbits from it while doing the limbo and taking off your clothes (the last part being the most important), I, on behalf of those who think with their dicks, don’t give a fuck about your handbag. Take it and shove it. I once spent an entire day fondling the excessive hair at the lower part of back and wondering 'why the fuck does any man require that?' and it was more constructive than posting ‘I like in the kitchen’.
And don’t blame me for thinking if you like getting banged in the kitchen when you post something like that. I’m not the pervert, actually I am the pervert but, if you are going to put thoughts in my head and couple that with those bra colors that you mentioned last time, my imagination has been running pretty wild. I’m just waiting for the day you upload a sound clip of “OHHH FUCKKKKKKKK, I CAN’T TAKE IT ANYMORE! STOOPP STOPPP!” under the guise of 'raising awareness for sound pollution caused by excessive honking' so that I can add sound effects to my imagination porno.
Seriously, if all you wanted was to let people think of you getting it off in different locations you could have just told me. Hey Leo, we’ve been friends for long time now so I think it’s about time I let you know that I love to get nailed in my balcony. Didn’t want everyone to know? You could have mailed me on leonardo.dapinchy@gmail.com. Have any naked pictures? Attach them as well to help me start off. I’m old and it takes a while these days.
Now, if you didn’t want this, then all I ask is ‘why?’. Every time I think, hey I’m not going to write an article belittling women but then you go and ruin it. You know how many female fans I’ve lost? When I finally make it big, write a book and have a book signing event whose titties am I going to sign? Do you want my book event to be a sausage party where I’m forced to sign hairy nipples? Why would I want to write a book to sign hairy nipples when all I have to do is take of my shirt? I want massive jugs to sign and if I don’t get them it’s your fault. Yesterday, I found one of my socks missing. I’ve no one to blame so I guess it’s your fault. Also, it’s your fault that when I walk on the road no hottie is ready to flash her hooters despite of me being an unfamous online writer. Maybe I should rip on Twilight, Chetan Bhagat, Commonwealth Games or Kalmadi like everyone else.
PS: The Facebook Bra Color Fiasco.
Facebook
Twitter
Reddit
Stumble
Digg
Posts: 26
Reply #26 on : Thu October 14, 2010, 22:11:30