Issue #4: Why I support Shiney Ahuja

Shiney Ahuja (15th May, 1973 – Any time in the near future, rough estimate, 22nd December, 2009) is an Indian actor and model who has been accused of raping his domestic help. Ever since the news hit the local newspapers, the media has made every attempt to ostracize the Filmfare winning actor. However Mr. Ahuja is innocent until proven guilty, at least that’s what the law of the land states.

shiney

Here are the two reasons why I think that Shiny Ahuja is innocent.

    Geographical: Shiney Ahuja was born in Delhi which is notorious as the rape capital of India. Rape is as much a part of the Delhi social fabric as say human sacrifice in the Aztec culture. In fact I am of the opinion that a lot of his friends from Delhi constantly reproached Shiney for being unable to live up to the proud Delhi tradition. Maybe Shiney just buckled under such immense peer pressure. I guess the Mumbai Police failed to take into consideration that every male in Delhi is allowed one attempted/successfully executed rape before he is actually taken seriously. Moninder Singh Pander was tagged a criminal only after he raped and ate a stadium full of people (guestimation). So I guess in that sense Shiney was really unlucky.

    Professional: After a successful stint as a model, Shiney made the inevitable switch into the film industry. With looks second to a cave troll and the acting prowess of a dead tree trunk, Shiney had it all. With the prestigious and most coveted Filmfare award in his kitty Shiney soon became the envy of the tinsel town. However none could see the storm brewing up inside Shiney who —as most people wouldn’t know— is an idealist in his own right. Constantly surrounded by actresses who strive for on-screen beauty and persona by undergoing innumerable boob/ lip jobs...and more often than not blowjobs, Shiney was disillusioned. Being amidst such ghouls of society, he lost touch with the real world, a world where you require talent to reach the zenith of your field. Then one day, an 18 year old maid, pristine as the first falling snow flakes, stepped into his life. Such was her grace in sweeping and swabbing, that Shiny could finally pull himself out of the mirage i.e. the film industry, and into a world where there is no place for mediocrity and banality. Shiney wanted her, Shiney needed her, and as they say, the rest is history!

Before anyone jumps to any opinions, let me say that, I do not believe Shiney is innocent. He was just a victim of circumstances. If you really want justice, ban him from acting because every time I see him on screen I feel violated too. If you want something more severe, ban Jacky Bhagnani and cast his movie Kal Kisne Dekha into the video nasty collection so that the two most important senses of any human being are not desecrated. Although this makes no sense, one has to look above the idea of rational thinking while dealing with scumbags like Jacky Bhagnani

PS: Fuck Shiney Ahuja and fuck all the newspapers that think he is important enough to be Page 1 material! Frankly speaking I don’t think people will even notice if Shiney is replaced by his wife Anupam in any of his upcoming projects.


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- Wasim Kadak (♫Who Da Funk - Shiny Disco Balls)

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First | Previous | Showing comments 6 to 10 of 11 | Next | Last
Ram
Posts: 11
Comment
Shiney Ahuja
Reply #6 on : Sun June 21, 2009, 23:58:10
Y shiney a maid???Did u thnk u cud get away with it??IThere are much better news that deserve to be on page 1 than dis 1......n he is guilty for sure.....Excellent article....kudos to the bigfish editors
rohhan
Posts: 11
Comment
Re: Why I support Shiney Ahuja
Reply #5 on : Mon June 22, 2009, 09:43:15
i still find it amusing that an actor who can pretty much screw any pyt, chooses his maid of alllll the people, i mean come on, ive not in my life seen a hot indian maid. wanting to fornicate with a maid defies all logic, and he goes ahead an rapes on.
Anon
Posts: 11
Comment
Re:
Reply #4 on : Mon June 22, 2009, 23:41:47
Pretty much boring shit...
Zara
Posts: 11
Comment
Shiney's maid is married
Reply #3 on : Tue June 23, 2009, 06:36:57
Shiney is being prejudiced. He is being humiliated and the media has already branded him ‘guilty’. Spare a thought for him guys… What if he is innocent? Shiney's maid doesn't appear to be only 38 kgs and in the photograph she can be seen wearing a mangalsutra and green bangles. She may be married. The police should find out every detail about her background. I cannot believe that Shiney can put his future and his career at stake for a maid. He is a celebrity and that are chances of a frame up for an ulterior motive. The investigation should be fair and not prejudiced. The police should investigate the truth and not endeavor to build a watertight case against Shiney. Shiney should get a chance to prove his innocence and should not be tried outside the court.
Nethra
Posts: 11
Comment
shiney agreed he is a rapist or so is the news...
Reply #2 on : Tue June 23, 2009, 11:30:43
Well written!! but if you ask me, I wud say he is not worth this discussion
what say???
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